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UNW: Thursday Night Annihilation
Thrusday Night Annihilation is a weekly program. This week it is 9-20-12. Results Backstage 1 JDUDE, "These lights are on both promotions, and you've got this mystery man, and a new diva, Sexxy Divva Woman, its just too wierd." Slashranger, "Trust me, I know. Oh, I gotta go." Marie Misses and Horror Fan pop out and hook arms with Slashranger. Slashranger, "Power is fun. I've got two for you, if you'd like?" JDUDE, "Oh, yeah." Miss Tessmacher and Angelina Love pop out. JDUDE, "Ooh, yeah." Match 1 Hawk and Eagle are backstage. Sexxy Divva Woman pops out. Sexxy Divva, "Whatcha doin'?" Hawk, "Watching UNW Annihilation too scope out the opposition, why?" Sexxy Divva, "Because I think you could stop paying attention to the tv, and pay attention to moi." Hawk, "Yeah. Um, we've got a match, bye Uggly Divva." Hawk and Eagle walk out. Their opponents Chris Humble and Good Looks come out. Hawk starts off and hits a Clothesline on Chris. Stone ColdSteve Austin comes in, and while the ref is distracted with Good Looks, Steve hits a stunner on Chris. Hawk covers. 1 2 3! Your winners: Hawk, and Eagle! Hawk, "See you at Destruction, Bum, and Help Wanted." Backstage 2 Skullbreaker and Jack Maybeck are backstage. Jack, "So, Jake, you like me?" Skullbreaker, "I can say I have yet to find a woman better than you. The whole UNW Divas roster combined don't compare to you." Jack blushes, then leaves to get ready for her match. Sexay Girrl enters. Sexay, "Hey, Jake." Skullbreaker, "Oh, hey Natasha." Sexay, "So. I like this guy. What should I say to him?" Skullbreaker, "Um, well, I'm not a romance expert, but if you want to get a guy, do sexy things in front of him. Guys like a Sexay Girrl." Sexay, "Thanks, Jake!" Skullbreaker, "Wait. Who do you like?" Sexay, "Hawk. But that Mystery Man, I like him too. He's just so muscular. And that suit costs a million! I saw it in the window of a store in the mall." Skullbuster, "Typical." Sexay, "What?" Skullbreaker, "For a girl to be THAT alert in a mall." Sexay leaves, and Skullbreaker gets ready for his match. Match 2 Skullbreaker walks out with Jack Maybeck. Then Mystery Man comes out with SDW(Sexxy Divva Woman). Mark Marverin, "This match will be a Mixed Tag Team Match!" The bell rings and its Skull(Skullbreaker) vs Mystery Man. Skull hist the Nosebreaker, and hits a Senton Bomb. All of a sudden, Ezekiel Jackson's music, Domination, hits. Ezekiel comes down with Kaity-Lynn, and start attacking Skull and Jack. Winnders: Skullbreaker and Jack Maybeck by DQ! Mystery Man and SDW join in the brawl. Ezekiel turns on Mystery Man, delivering a Book of Ezekiel to both Mystery Man and Skullbreaker. Kaity-Lynn hits a Superkick on both SDW and Jack Maybeck. Big Zeke and Kaity walk out victorious, and Skullbreaker is giving him the evil eye. Match 3 Hugh Jackman comes out with his new theme music, Logan Through Time from the X-Men Origins: Wolverine soundtrack. His opponent, Money Meister, comes out. The bell rings. Hugh starts out on the ground, with Meister easily dominating. Hugh turns it around with a Superkick, and hits a Diving Elbow Drop. Money Mountain tries to interfere, but Hugh hits him with a KO Punch. Meister is up by now, and Hugh dodges his clothesline and hits him with a KO Punch. 1 2 3! Hugh celebrates his victory. Money Mountain sneaks up behind him with a chair, but Mr. Ice hits him with a Sledgehammer, rolls him onto the announce table, stands on the turnbuckle, and hits an Ice Cold to bust Mountain through the announce table. Meister is up by now, and Sam American's music hits. Sam's out, but immedaitely, No Chance in Hell turns on. JDUDE and Slashranger4444 come out. JDUDE, "Hold on. You two have a no contact rule! Sam, if you touch him, I swear..." Hugh hits Meister with a chair. Slashranger, "That's better than Sam hitting him..." JDUDE, "I suppose it is. But, Sam, once again, NO CONTACT until HWE Fall Hard on the 25th." Sam, "I don't think you need to worry about me, Mr. JDUDE, but he's another story." Money Mountain hits Sam American and Mr. Ice with a chair. Hugh hits a KO Punch on Mountain. JDUDE, "Alright, alright. The next person in that ring who touches another superstar, gets FIRED." All of them walk out. Match 4 Zack Ryder comes out with Curt Hawkins. Zack, "WOO WOO WOO, YOU KNOW IT!" Curt, "WWWYKI!" Rick Wild, "Hey, you got a Mindless Drone to follow you around. Well, here's mine!" Ezekiel Jackson comes out and hits a Book of Ezekiel on Zack and Curt. Ezekiel, "DOMINATION!" Rick, "THE PERSONIFICATION OF DOMINATION!" Kaity-Lynn comes out. Rick, "Say hello, to the inter-company stable, Personification of Domination. We control all of UNW, HWE, and WWE." Big Zeke, "That's right. Domination!" Kaity, "Domination!" All of them, "PERSONIFICATION OF DOMINATION!" Ezekiel and Rick walk down for their match against Help Wanted and Bum. JDUDE, "Hold on. No. No, no, no!" Ezekiel, "Shut up, J." Mr. McMahon walks out. McMahon, "Jackson, YOU'RE, FIRED!" Slashranger, "Kaity, you have a match at Destruction, so I can't fire you. You're safe for now." JDUDE, "Sam with you, Rick. This is your last chance." Slashranger, "I'm sorry, but the worst punishment I'm giving you, is this match, is CANCELLED!" MAIN EVENT Help Wanted comes out, followed by his opponent, Bum. Mick, "This is phenominal! The tag team partners put their friendship aside to fight the last match of the night!" The bell rings and Bum hits a Superkick on Help Wanted(HW). HW hits a Trash Heap, then a Dumpster Dive. Bum gets up, and hits the Beanie Bag on HW, and goes for the pin. 1 2 NO! HW kicks out, and their opponents, Hawk and Eagle, come out. Hawk, "Oh, look, a family feud." Eagle, "Brothers shouldn't fight like this." HW and Bum are distracted long enough that Money Meister and Money Mountain attack them. The match is ruled as a No Contest, but both participants want to keep going. Bum hits another Beanie Bag, and goes for a second pinfall attempt. 1 2 NO! HW once again hits a Trash Heap, and finally, a last Dumpster Dive. 1 2 3! Mick, "I don't think they should have fought against each other, it looks like there's some major tension." Barry, "That's great if there's some tension! Hawk and Eagle'll win the titles!" Mick, "Oh, then maybe you could go work for HWE!" Barry, "I'm actually asking JDUDE for a contract!" Mick, "Get out, then." Slashranger4444, "Alright, we have finished the signing. Barry, get out of this arena and this promotion, you're heading to HWE, William Dite is heading to UNW!" Barry stares in disbelief, then slowly walks to the back while William Dite walks down to end the show.